Elect a zombie in Wisconsin

Preternatural Post Zombie Trading Card
Preternatural Post Zombie Trading Card

Perhaps following the example of the American Vampire League (AVL), zombies are running for political office in Wisconsin. Republicans are allegedly even recruiting zombies as challengers in some races. It seems the GOP thinks zombies will be easier to defeat than, say, Democrats. How effective this strategy is remains to be seen.

The most recent reports are coming in from  Dane101.com identifies three zombies known to have been recruited by the Republican Party and running for office in Districts 14, 18 and 10.  The goal of this zombie recruitment effort, which the more politically correct Milwaukee Journal Sentinel refers to them as “fake” and “protest” candidates, appears to be to force an early primary election. Unnamed Republican sources indicated to the Sentinel that most races across the state will include a zombie candidate.

Wisconsin is not the only state where zombies are politically active this year.

In Jacksonville, FL, last month, it wasn’t zombie candidates Republicans were courting but zombie voters. WTSP quoted First Coast Tea Party President as saying:

Zombies hate people who pray. They don’t believe in it and that is a good thing!”

This contention has not been proven (Max Brooks and the Department of Zombie Defense have not commented publicly on the situation) but at least it explains why Tucker exhorted her fellow Tea Partiers to pray. It’s the only way to stop the zombie infestation.

Also in May, on Friday, 13 May, 2011 to be exact, zombies and by some reports vampires, joined force to march on the Washington State Capitol protesting a brutal state budget and advocating creative new approaches to solving the states fiscal woes. The march was organized by Undead Olympia.

Politically speaking, zombies have long been affiliated with the Democratic party. The Urban Dictionary defines a zombiecrat as “A Democrat who blindly supports elite candidates of his or her party. Similar to 99 % of all Republicans.”

The affiliation may go as far back as the mid-20th Century when comedian Bob Hope joked that Democrats were zombies.

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